i heard on tv once, the personal-financial pundit Susan Orman say to a person, “You can’t do that.” …speaking to someone about their desire/choice to give donations to a deserving organization. Her point was (to this person) if you don’t have the means, if you aren’t earning enough to care for yourself, then you can’t play the “altruist”, the “benevolent giver” when you see someone in need. People with means, can. But you, no.
My dw is stuck in this one. She is very talented and hard working, and does very well at business whenever she tries, but she donates most of her time to the church and to “improving others.” She is heavily involved in the mormon church — the top young women’s organization leader. And she spends season after season, organizing huge undertakings — usually proposed by the men (god’s chosen leaders) organizing and fundraising for “faith-promoting activities.” for example, the every-four-year multi-day “mormon trek” activity to simulate the suffering of mormon pioneers on their journey West (whichwasorderedbyasupposedprophetwhowasmarryingyounggirlsandhavinghiscakeandeatingittoo inyoungsmalltownchristianamericawhilepeoplediedinterriblyharshconditionsnotforseen(apparently) bythegodwhowasrunningtheshow), or organizing in great detail (lots of people and assignments) an evening where young kids (14-17) participate in assimulating the first days of “going on a mission” for the church (torecruitlifetimetithe-payingmemberstoaddtothechurch’srannuityofdonationsandbythewayitispaidforbythemissionaryhimorherselforbyhisfamilywhichisarealnicearrangementifyouarethechurch!)
We are broke. Wifey can earn, but she is convinced that she has a higher calling. Just shoot me.